In their first games, England came out and looked like crap, no rhythm, not really meshing and needed a huge defensive error to get past Paraguay. Trinidad came out with a lot of energy, played over their heads, and down to 10 men hung on for a result against Sweden. I wanted to see another game to see how that would hold up, and in the first half it really did.
England's best scoring chance, and the horrid, horrid, dare I say horrid execution of it really says it all about their first half. In the 43rd minute, Steven Gerrard plays a cross to a wide-open, nobody near him, enough time to settle the ball, have a nice cup o' tea, put on an apron and bake some damn cookies before anybody got anywhere near him. So he instead tries this panicked side volley off his calf. His next big chance was an attempted bicycle kick in the 55th minute, with predictable results from a 6'7" Englishman who hunches over when he runs.
In the 45th minute, Paul Robinson came way, way out for a ball, but of course got nowhere near it. The ball got lobbed around the box until Stern John, fighting his way between two defenders put a header on target to the empty net. If John Terry hadn't thrown himself recklessly into the goal to clear it before landing with a nasty thud, this game might have ended quite differently. I think we may need the state department to work out a deal to trade a couple American keepers to England for an attacking midfielder.
In the second half, Michael "I had one great goal 8 years ago and I plan on milking it my whole career" Owen went off so their latest savior could come on, and of course I mean Wayne Rooney. The buildup immediately did become a lot better, favoring short, controlled passes over the long crosses with nobody on the end of them that England uses when they're letting their delusions of grandeur dictate tactics. Part of why they annoy me is they're good but play badly when they obstinately cling to this classic, pastoral image of English football that involved working class stiffs kicking a medicine ball around in the mud, and appropriate tactics. Arsenal make a distinctly English style work, aggressive and direct without being clumsy kick-and-run, and Beckham, Gerrard, and Rooney all have the skill and the poise to stamp that style on a more sophisticated game, so that's why it annoys the crap out of me when they play like a bunch of hyperactive teenagers with blue balls and hormones raging.
So anyways, Rooney being on the field really dramatically improves their offensive game, and Owen and Crouch really don't seem to play off of each other too well. What was classic was at one point seeing "All Night Dwight" Yorke taking the ball off of Rooney, like two eras of Manchester United's history were colliding... you could almost hear Yorke asking Rooney, "Hey, remember back when we used to win trophies?"
A fair result would have been a draw, given England's incompetence, Shaka Hislop's resurgence, and Trinidad threatening an upset all game, but in the end it worked out the way it should on paper. In the 83rd minute, David Beckham was given ages of time and space by what had to be an exhausted Trinidad defense to set up a cross out on the right wing, which he took advantage of because he's a crafty guy on the field, and a stylish one off it, even if he is a total idiot (even his friends say so publicly, which is kind of funny). Beckham's cross was perfectly placed to the far post, where Peter Crouch had his man one-on-one, and Crouch's height was decisive in going over the top for the header. This play definitely produced my man of the match: Stewart Downing. A man who hadn't previously made much of an impact in the game, not a big figure in an England uniform, but he quietly bided his time, and when an exuberant Peter Crouch streaked to the sidelines and waiting England supporters, Stewart Downing selflessly threw himself on Crouch like a soldier diving on a grenade. An international TV audience of millions upon millions would have been exposed to the Peter Crouch RoboDance goal celebration, but for the heroic efforts of Stewart Downing. God Save the Queen.
The steam was clearly taken out of Trinidad, and in the 91st minute, Gerrard iced it with a shot from distance, to put England up by two. Hopefully England will start rolling, because while I may amuse myself bitching about the excesses of England supporters, I want to see the game played at a high level and they can do that when they set their minds to it.
Three Lions 2-0 Soca Warriors
Crouch '83
Gerrard '91
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