Just to clarify, no matter what ESPN says, there is no magazine called El Equipe in France and there was also nobody named Em Jacquet in the stadium. There is a magazine called L'Equipe, who once printed an apology to Aime Jacquet after they ripped him and he won the World Cup.
God I love fucking France. Actually I love anybody who takes out Portugal so I don't have to watch them try to flop their way to a win. Seriously, my fucking god does Cristiano Ronaldo go down more easily than an East Dubuque stripper with a $20 bill in her hand. I've never seen dives so obvious go unpunished, either, when he's out of position and can't make a play on the ball, so he runs up to somebody and tries to fall against them. The play where Nuno Valented megged a defender on the edge of the box and sent a pass through but missed Ronaldo and Postiga, upon which they both fell over at the same time was priceless, especially since the French defenders were moving away from them.
What makes it funnier is France scored on a penalty, when Thierry Henry just inside the box faked a Portuguese defender out so badly the guy fell down backwards, but took a desperate flail at the ball after Henry had already moved it away to set up his next move. Henry took a crack on the shin as he turned to pursue his ball, which really only hindered him slightly, but he hit the ground arms windmilling. He clearly made a meal of it when he went down, but it was a foul clear as day. Zidane did his funky hook shot where he faces right and whips his leg around to send the ball left, perfectly placed inside the post. Ricardo read it perfectly, but couldn't get to it. I'm actually tremendously impressed with Ricardo, I assume he'll be catching a train to Spain this fall, since he's listed as playing for Sporting in Portugal.
Given that penalty, Portugal figured they'd try their luck, and a few minutes later, Cristiano Ronaldo couldn't get to a cross so he put his hands up and takes the most theatrical dive I've ever seen, running in with his his hands up and jumping as high as he can when he gets near a defender, letting his body go limp at the apex of his flight, descending like tragic Icarus into the sea. If there hadn't been a cross going over his head, the guy would have been carded for diving, so he came out of it fairly fortunate. This didn't stop the Portuguese bench from going nuts, mobbing the 4th official, and throwing a water bottle onto the field. Seriously, they conduct themselves like animals, and Cristiano Ronaldo has such a reputation now that he misses as many legitimate calls as he gets, and I think the Dutch didn't just hammer him because they knew he'd dive anyways. It only infuriates me because the guy is seriously so fucking talented.
France certainly kept it nightmarishly close as only France can do. When Cristiano Ronaldo dove for a free kick in the 78th minute, his shot went right to Barthez, who scooped it straight up in the air. That almost led to the equalizer, but Luis Figo headed the ball over the bar. Injury time took a year off my life as the Portuguese were relentlessly pounding away at the French goal. Even Ricardo came all the way up for that, taking bicycle kicks outside the box to keep Portugal's attack alive, and that guy handles the ball well for a keeper.
Zinedine Zidane has said he's retiring from club and country after the World Cup, and is certainly playing every game like it's his last. Tonight he was incredible in maintaining possession, which is really the thing that's really freaky about him. He can play keep-away with 3-4 players from one of the world's best teams, and it's like a 6'5" man holding a ball over his head to keep it away from 7 year old kids, nobody's even got a chance at getting it from him. At one point he just casually stood and stared down the entire Portuguese back line, like "You guys know better to even try, huh?" The final is going to be an absolute hell of a game.
It was nice to see a fairly physical game with some nastiness and diving end with one nice image of sportsmanship, when the captains, Zidane and Figo, exchanged armbands and jerseys. Those two are wily old veterans, both just fantastic to watch in their prime, and it was cool to see Zidane celebrating with his French teammates with Luis Figo's jersey on. Plus I will say this for Portugal, that is a cool color for a jersey, and that color looks great on the Italian keepers as well. The 3rd place game may be pretty good, since usually in these tournaments it's somebody talented who could basically give a flying fuck about 3rd place against some smaller team that gets a lot of pride from 3rd place, like Holland v Croatia in '98, so the small team wins. Germany will be playing at home, and Portugal still may have enough to prove that taking down Germany in Stuttgart would be good.
I'm so totally going into withdrawal once this is over, it's not going to be pretty.
France 1-0 Portugal
'33 Zidane (pen)
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