10. Transfers from home office in London will go gaga for coworkers with a full set of white teeth, and with a little panache you can save a few bob on dates by passing off Billy Goat's as fine local cuisine.
9. No more of that herring and gouda cheese stinking up the joint, just the delightful musk of deep fried battered fish, just as God and St. George intended.
8. Credit default swap hooligans roaming the halls in Burberry caps really keep the clients in line.
7. The top few floors of the building will be turned into a giant clock set to London time, so you can close up shop at noon local time.
6. Burberry toilet paper really classes up the joint.
5. No more rolling over for Gerry and raising the white flag as soon as you see Deutschebank roll into town with their spiked helmets... this ain't Credit Lyonnais.
4. All the broken ATM's will finally be repaired (but they still won't dispense cash on cold mornings.)
3. Based on every conversation I've had with one of her majesty's subjects about North American geography, you can tell your boss Chicago to Milwaukee is a 9-hour flight and schedule a paid vacation day. (Given his parentage, this may also explain that time the Captain drove us straight east for an hour while insisting we were still in his neighborhood.)
2. To the great relief of employees, bonuses will now be paid in proper currency with a rich lady's face stamped on them, instead of distributing the millions of guilders left over in the vault.
1. From here on out, it's all bluefish and bluechips, baby. So put a couple lanterns in the window and enjoy the ride.
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